How to Properly Break Your Ankle: Days 62 - 65

Perk number 127 about being broken and shopping: electric carts.

Both of my electric cart experiences were when I was with my dad. The first one happened at a Costco. We were just walking in together, minding our own business, when the greeter stops me and says, "Would you like an electric cart today?"
I light up like a little kid looking at presents and say, "Sure!"
I get in and the fun begins.

Weeeeeeeeeeee!

My dad is a big believer in doing things your own way. It always has some joke side of it, but once I got in this cart, he was all for me running down the slow people. To be honest, if I'm going faster than you in an electric cart, you should consider your walking speed.

And the crowd goes WILD.

Then things got really good when I had an entire aisle to myself. I just kind of swerved back and forth, doing my best to enjoy my privileges.

And you thought this couldn't be cool....

A few days later, I went shopping at the mall with my mom. I tried to convince her to push me in one of those firetruck carts meant for little kids, but she wouldn't buy it. Instead we just went to different stores and I searched for shorts so I can stop rolling the left side of my pants up in this fashion.

Do I see the next hipster trend coming along?

One of the stores we were in, Gap, I had tried on a pair of shorts and my boot was off since it's kind of like a big shoe, and I grossed out another mom. It wasn't on purpose of course, she was just standing there awkwardly and I needed to show my mom to get her opinion. The interaction between me and the other mom looked kind of like this:

 *Exposure exaggerated for dramatic effect.

A huge bonus at the mall was that I get priority on the elevator because we're not risking me breaking another ankle on the escalators. Although, when it really mattered to get on the elevator, it was filled with parents and their children. So I rode the elevator "alone" while my mom took the escalator.

But we ended our day correctly, with a nice red velvet cupcake from the cupcake store.

<3

Why There is a Lack of Posting:

I know mostly friends and family read this so you understand the lack of posting about my amazing ankle. But just in case you were wondering, the story goes kind of like this:

Once upon a time, there was a fearless princess who thought she could do anything.

Don't let the dress fool you.

So when the idea of challenging the most ferocious monster building of them all, all she had to say was "Bring it."

Monster: "Oh it's been BRUNG!"

The fight looked promising in the beginning. You could see that the princess had high expectations and believed she could win the fight.

Hehehe. Suckerrrr.

But then, the monster had a wild card it had yet to play. The princess was bombarded with group projects, bi-weekly papers, and chapter readings.

"My leg!!"

The conflict has yet to be resolved, but the good news is that the light at the end of the tunnel is coming. The princess knows she only has to hold out for a few more weeks and then she'll be free.

I will win this fight.

Until then, this is the best I've got.

How to Properly Break Your Ankle: Day 61

Today was a big day. First of all, I was seeing this crazy girl -no really, she's crazy- I've known since 6th grade and we were off to "The Happiest Place on Earth." That's right folks, this is all about Disneyland: Injured Style.

We get to Disneyland and first things first, we trade in my crutches for a wheelchair. It wasn't the best of all wheelchairs but it was a worthwhile investment.

The first attraction we went to we kind of made fools of ourselves. We were having issues with a self-operational lift and no one really cared to help us. But once we got over that hump we went on much cooler rides, like Indiana Jones.

Go figure they let the broken one be the driver.

Then, we went on other rides. First there was Pirates of the Caribbean, then Haunted Mansion.
The coolest thing about the Haunted Mansion was that we got a secret extra ride. When you're in a wheelchair, you get to ride the Doom Buggy through the entire track and get spit out where you load. Then, you go back through the way you came in and up the elevator and out the front entrance.

Super secret back way!

Then we went on more rides, including Thunder Mountain Railroad, It's A Small World, and Buzz Lightyear Astro Blasters. Astro Blasters was awesome! I got a really high score.

I rock.

Next, we found our way to Space Mountain and even watch the Captain EO movie. This of course only resulted in my further desire to one day dance as cool as Michael Jackson.

Overall, a Disneyland experience is made exponentially better in a wheelchair because you don't have to wait in long lines and deal with as many people.

There is the dark side of being in a wheelchair at Disneyland though. You would think people would be considerate of the fact that you're in a wheelchair. Mostly because when you compare wheelchairs to strollers, wheelchairs have a lot less protection for the person in them. But overall, I was treated like any other stroller. We were cut off, no one really tried to dodge us, and we almost ran over a few people.

They totally deserved it.

How to Properly Break Your Ankle: Days 57 - 60

After weeks of being deprived of some of the coolest kids I know (Forrest and Savannah), I was finally invited over to their place for a potluck.
The potluck was said to start at six at their place and for once I arrived almost on time. The moment I got there, it all kind of looked like this:

*crickets chirp*

Slowly, people showed up, and once everyone was there it was brought to my attention that everyone knew about me with the following conversation occurring multiple times in slightly different ways.
Person: "So uh, how did you do that?" *points to ankle*
Me: "Oh, I was bouldering with these kids," *points to Forrest and Savannah* "and I fell."
Person: "Oooooooh! You're that friend!"
Me: *laughs* "Yeah, that's me."

Proud moment #57

The potluck ended as any potluck would, people slowly started to trickle out as the night went on. I finally decided to leave when I considered I still had to make a 40 minute drive back home. But I did not leave without attempting a live action crutch shuffle for Ms. Savannah Russell.

Don't try this at home.

A few days later, a friend invited me to check out the Torrey Pines Glider Port with him. Before I had gotten down there, it seemed to have slipped his mind that I was on crutches and he wanted to take this treacherous path down to the beach below. With one look at it I quickly informed him that wasn't happening.

Cliff of DOOM.

He managed to make up for it though because I got to experience my first piggy back ride as an injured person.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Afterwards, we watched 2001: A Space Odyssey. I proceeded to have my mind blown yet again.

Then I spent my Tuesday eagerly anticipating Wednesday.

Disneyland, Disneyland, Disneyland, Disneyland!!

How To Properly Break Your Ankle: Day 56

On this particular day, I was getting a visit from my good friend/old RA Andrew. He came bearing much wisdom -the best being how I should not go to grad school. Unfortunately, life may pan out in a way that grad school is the only option for me.

But enough about the lame stuff! What really matters is how we decided to spend our entire day together.

Amy and Andrew: Professional Adventurers.

Our day started off poorly.

This lasted a good half hour.

I was determined to show Andrew that I am capable of fun things. We started our day with a healthy, huge, breakfast. And then were on our way to the Air and Space Museum.

We played in the space exhibit first. We learned that you can't go in to space if you're broken, no space colony is complete without a trampoline, and that 4D technology is out of this world.

That last one is water getting thrown in our faces. Andrew had protection, I did not.

We went and played in the air exhibit next. This wasn't as exciting, they just had a bunch of airplanes.

Snoopy as the Red Baron was a big perk.

Once we left the Air and Space Museum we had a long walk back to the car. It was basically Andrew's form of torture. Of course, he played it off as preparation for my days at Cal Poly.

Worst. Idea. Ever.

Then we were on our way to Seaport Village for a quick stop. We went in to the kite shop and the guy working told me about how he broke his ankle once too.

We're besties now.

After our brief visit at Seaport Village, Andrew drove us to hang out with his friends. Where we proceeded to get dinner and then play Boggle for hours.

Andrew is the worst Boggle player ever.

Then, our day drew to a close and Andrew finally dropped me off at my house.

How to Properly Break Your Ankle: Day 55

Today was all about the visit to the doctor. It's been about two months since the incident when I broke my ankle, let's recap on how it all went down -with some added bonus information.

How to Properly Break Your Ankle: The Amy Anderson Way

Step 1: Go bouldering with friends.

Step 2: When it's your turn, first be sure to fake your fight with gravity. Then have a real competition, see who wins. Also, be sure only one part of you misses the crash pad and listen for the snap when you land.

     To deviate for just a moment, I did not just break one part of my fibula, I        broke two parts of it.

          The first, larger break, was fixed easily once the screws were inserted.

          But the second, smaller break (as circled in both x-ray photos) is the                 special one. When you break your fibula, there are two different ways               to break it. The 'normal' way and the 'other' (or Amy Anderson) way.
               The normal way leaves your fibula broken at an angle -there's a                        doctor term for an angled fracture but I am no doctor, I think it                        starts with an 'o.'
               The Amy Anderson way is when you break your fibula with a                            perpendicular fracture (again, not a doctor term.) The boring part                      about a perpendicular fracture is that it takes your bone longer to                      heal because there is less surface area for it to heal to.

And I thought that was a dust fleck...

Step 3: Once the paramedics arrive, make life easier on yourself and have them remove the shoe on your foot for you.

Step 4: Once in the hospital, just kind of hang out and wait for your doctor to set your ankle so it doesn't look like this anymore:

Step 5: Stay in the hospital an extra day because you're running a fever and try not to go stir crazy.

I'm surprised there were no repercussions for writing on the walls.

Step 6: Fill your time at home with mostly useless activities until you're more mobile.

So bored!

Step 6.5: If you hang out with friends, don't let them pity you. Do your best to convince them you're completely capable ... then fall right in front of them.

Step 7: Go to your doctor for a check up around two months after the incident and learn that because you just had to be different, you get to be on crutches and in a boot longer.

But it's cool because then you can be buff in one leg and not the other

Booyah!

How to Properly Break Your Ankle: Days 47-54

As mentioned in other posts, I spend a lot of my time sitting on my bed, watching the next episode of Bones or a random now streaming movie on Netflix.

If the movies are really good -and my friends are online- I narrate the best parts of the movie to them. Case and point, Aliens.

"They're coming out of the goddamn walls!"

Other movies that deserve honorable mentions are:
Clash of the Titans

2001: A Space Odyssey

At first glance it may look boring....

... but once you get it, it's kind of like this.

This laziness can occur for days on end until something interrupts me; like my roommate needing Netflix for a paper, or the mailman delivering a package. This package was no ordinary package though. No. This package came with a specially wrapped new super power for Crutch Girl.

What followed was a sequence of awesome that can best be described with this comic panel:

Thus marks the first time Crutch Girl ventured out on her own.