Amy (and Monica) Take Thailand: A Lesson in Holiday Depression

Let me tell you a story about Holiday depression.

But Amy, you say, that's like a unicorn! It's not real.

Just wait until you live it.

Overall, Thailand has been great. My students behave as I imagine all high school students behave - slightly naughty, not always wanting to learn, but weighed out by all the students that wish to learn and talk English with me.

But then, like a creeping, unsuspecting monster, the holidays began creeping up on me.

It started simple, Thanksgiving came and went. I taught my students about turkey and pilgrims and native Americans. I taught them that their Thai translation of Thanksgiving was incorrect, Thanksgiving is not about Jesus Christ.

And I taught them the most important lesson, how to draw a hand turkey.

..... They seemed to miss the "turkey" part of the lesson. But fun was had by everyone.

I talked with my parents (who didn't have much of a Thanksgiving because of an earlier one, that I also managed to miss) and to my sister.

SUDDENLY IT WAS DECEMBER!

First there was Father's Day, where I began documenting just how long my "short" skirt was in comparison to every other Thai teacher.

Look at this handsome man!

They can't wait to meet you!

Here is the famous P'Co. 

And one of my favorite coworkers.

All dressed up for Father's Day.

Look at the backs of those knees.

Students crowding the teachers.

Selfie!

I signed a book to tell The King I like him.

Just a regular day slacking off.

EXPOSED KNEES!

Then, I was off to visit Monica for a weekend filled with Monica + Amy time + OTHER FOREIGNERS! WHO KNEW THEY EXISTED?!

But first, a missed bus results in a hair photoshoot in a hotel room.

My students braided my hair. Still undecided.

Different times. Neither correct.

I think this is the bus schedule?

Made it to Monica!

Went to a lookoout.

Pretty sweet view

DINOSAURS!

Attempts at a 360 shot.

THEN WE WENT TO A WATERFALL

I slid down most of that dirt path. Much to the amusement of the Thais.

We even went on a sunset bike ride!!

New foreign friends!!

He's my favorite.

Pictures of pictures!

Oh snap!

Then back on a bus.

Poinsettias!

The cloud made a shadow in the sky.

I was obsessed.

The smaller bus back to Lat Yao.

The sun is setting. It was pretty. This picture does it no justice.

My view as I waited for Ann.

I returned to my village. And to work. And the beginning of stress over the upcoming holiday events.

And then I started getting sad. At first, the rational thought of "Oh my period is just coming soon," passed through my head. But the sadness stayed and the period came and went.

I worked hard to help with the "Christmas Day Activity" and the "Walk Rally" my school decided to host. Packages were arriving from the States filled with love and gifts to make me feel a little less homesick.

Parents

Wrapped presents!

Unwrapped early!

Laura (& kind of Austin)

Also unwrapped early

The Walk Rally was on December 22nd. And, a huge success. There were five holidays: Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentine's Day, and Easter.

I dressed up in support of Halloween.

This was the scariest I could get.

But pre-activity, I got bunny ears on my head.

My students were much scarier than me.

Christmas booth prep!

The Valentine's Day students strangely absent.

A pretty sweet Thanksgiving booth.

Some rather naughty students.

CHICKENS!

The Easter booth!

Halloween's booth from the outside.

Valentine's Day had some mood flowers.

My students decorated these eggs themselves!

In costume!

Going for scary.

I think they win. Also, I turned off my self timer.

Some of my better students.

But seriously, she's adorable.

Another naughty student.

The Walk Rally ended and I got a day breather to prepare for the next activity, Christmas Day (on Christmas Eve). Disclaimer, there are way less photos because I was on stage for this entire event and did not bring my phone.

Today's costume: Santalita!

Or, you know, Mrs. Claus.

Plus my alter-ego teaching outfit!

Complete with red hair chalk!

It's like Christmas! My printer was returned to me.

The stage - pre-activity time.

All dressed up.

Crazy students wanted in on my post-activity photo shoot.

The activity ended. Students left after lunch (surprise! no afternoon class with no warning!), the Thai teachers went off to a 3 hour meeting. The foreigner teachers (Teacher Lucy, Teacher Amanda, and I) sat in the office until we were summoned at 4:15 for our New Years gift.

AND SUDDENLY AND WITHOUT WARNING, while sitting there, people watching the Thais freak out over whatever gift they all wanted, with Teacher Amanda shoved up in my space so that she can sit two to a chair with P'Co's daughter, everything got sad. I had to leave immediately.

I made Amanda move, I went to the bathroom, and I cried. I thought I finished and walked back downstairs to only have another wave of sadness overcome me.

I hid in the stairwell, praying that I didn't hear my name get called and that no teacher would walk by. Because what's worse than crying at school is crying at school with an audience. Especially because apparently Thais don't cry.*

I mostly fixed myself. I chose to stay in the office rather than try to join the celebration. I was tired of listening to people speaking Thai anyway. When another wave of sadness washed over me I went back to the bathroom and cleaned up. Finally I heard people leaving so I knew I could get out of there too. But somehow I got myself sucked into a conversation and immediately the flood gates opened.

Sadness and tears poured out of me. The Thai teachers tried understanding, I told them I missed home. They understood. Christmas is important, right? You'd be with your family, right?

Yeah, yeah. I'd answer. Wishing the questions would stop so I could just go home.

But I had to get my present. A basket. Oh man, that's almost as awesome as a scale [this year's birthday present from the school]! And I couldn't leave without spilling out my frustrations to the Chinese teacher. (Who, I thought, would not share what I said, but did).

Finally I left. I got myself out of there. And I was greeted at my house by a lovely sight. My final pre-Christmas present that I almost thought wouldn't make it to me in time.

From Ying-Ying

GINGERBREAD COOKIES!!

So that made things slightly better. Now I have more cookies as comfort food for my Holiday depression.

I assume I'm somewhere in the middle of this. With hopes that continued listening to Christmas music (even after Christmas ends), watching of Christmas movies (also even after Christmas ends), and visiting another foreigner for New Year's will help reduce this. I'm sure it will, Or, you know, time. Whichever works for me first.

I also assume that really all Holiday depression comes down to is happiness during activities related to the holiday, and then sadness when reminded that you're not surrounded by the people who know you best. 

Monica, on the other hand, had a stressful day today at least. I didn't get to hear much of her story because I got busy and I talked more (surprise!) But Monica will be off to Cambodia for the New Year's 9 day vacation she's got. I've got 5 days and cannot join her. She's got like 24893489034 foreign teachers at her school (or just like 12). And, as far as I've heard, is still having a great time. 

So this was not the happy-go-lucky post that usually comes from here. But this is where I am. I'm just trying to figure out how best to cope with it.

From: http://typeinspire.com/images/portfolio/Merry_Christmas_Red_by_mrana.jpg

MERRY CHRISTMAS** TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!!!

*I have no scientific evidence to back this up. But judging by how weirded out they get when I cry, I assume crying is not as common. Then again, maybe everyone is weirded out by crying....

**OR HAPPY HOLIDAYS!! OR MERRY FESTIVUS!! OR HAPPY HANUKKAH!!! OR HAPPY SOLSTICE!! OR WHATEVER ELSE YOU CELEBRATE!! (or don't)